CCT 28-1_LR

Helping Broken Boys Become Mended Men My favorite thing is meeting with men one-on-one. Because they know I work with men as a vocation, they tend to open up about their struggles. Whether 18 or 80, they inevitably mention one or more of the following seven inner aches and pains: • “I just feel like I am in this alone.” • “I don’t feel like God cares about me personally—not really.” • “I don’t feel like my life has a purpose—it feels random.” • “No matter how hard I try, I can’t overcome the destructive behaviors that keep dragging me down.” • “My soul feels dry.” • “My most important relation ships are not healthy.” • “I don’t feel like I’m doing anything that will make a dif ference and leave the world a better place.” Christian men are not exempt. No matter how much a man loves or wants to love God, it is difficult to move forward when he is stuck in the past. The “men problem” is deeply tied to the reality that 70% or more of men are growing up in dysfunc tional families. 1 What You Can Do Let’s tell men: “Your wounds may describe you, but they don’t have to define you.” We can also tell them: “To discover healthy male behavior, you need to heal and break the cycle. To break free, you must go through your pain, not around it.” As a counselor, pastor, or friend, say: “I’m going to help you unravel what happened to you and why. I’ll help you face the truth, grieve what should have been, and find rest for your soul. When the time is right,

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christian counseling today VOL. 28 NO. 1