Out & About Autumn 2019

Out&About wellbeing

EDUCATION

Starting school The start of the new school year can be a stressful time for both parents and children. AMANDA BAILEY suggests some coping mechanisms to ease the process

P arents and children can experience a real mixture of emotions at this time of year as the summer holiday ends and the new school year begins. There may be a sadness as the freedom of relaxed mornings, fun family times and outdoor activities comes to an end, while some families will be relieved as they no longer have to juggle work and childcare. Some will feel bereft with the thought of early- morning school routines, bedtime at seven and homework to do. Others will feel excited to see friends and enjoy activities they love – sport, science, art, writing stories. For many it will be a mixture of all these feelings. For many parents, maintaining the emotional balance and sense of well-being for all family members within the context of term time routines is a primary consideration.

The summer holidays are often characterised by a period when family members proactively create happy, fun, connected experiences, except of course the back-to-school shoe shopping expedition. Outside of the ‘family bubble’ it is all too easy to become disconnected from that relaxed, centred warmth as external factors we have no or little control of become part of our daily lives: Monday morning, another child’s unwanted actions or words, homework to complete, to name but a few. There are so many ways to consistently enable your child to relax, be calm and peaceful. Just as a muscle is strengthened through exercise, relaxation is an ability we can all develop through practice. Here are some ideas for before and after school. Breathing Tip For a child who finds difficulty relaxing into sleep try the ‘Bubble’ (parent and child breathing together) Take your child into a sitting or lying hug Place your hands on the child’s belly. With your child in your hug, simultaneously take 10 deep nasal breaths into the belly. Make sure your child can feel your belly inflating at the same time as you feel your child’s belly inflating. The ‘Bubble’ activates the relaxation and calming response and provides a strong feeling of safety, relaxation and connection. Depending on the number of people in the family, who would benefit from this breathing technique parents can breathe in simultaneous pairs: ‘Double Bubble’ or lie in a family bubble, all breathing together, with hands on each other’s bellies.

BEFORE SCHOOL: Walk, scoot or cycle to school (the whole distance or park and walk/ride whenever possible) – this gives your child an endorphin and energy boost and they start their day calmer, happier and energised. It’s also a great time to talk. Breathe – Take in three deep nasal breaths, saying ‘I am’, breathing into the lower belly then let go easily saying ‘Here’. Set yourself up for a positive day: breath in saying: ‘I am peace’, then ‘I am happiness’, finally ‘I am love’. Positive Affirmation – Give your child a positive focus for the day, ‘I am kind’, ‘I am clever’, ‘I am a good friend’. AFTER SCHOOL: Chill out Space/Calm Box – Take some time out to relax and be quiet. Encourage your child to ‘chill out’, if happy to, lie down using blankets, beanbags and cushions: read a favourite book, look through a special

photo album full of important people, special places and events, enjoy a foot or hand massage, listen to some music. Relax. Just Be. Chat – Be an active listener. If your child wants to talk about any stresses or worries – attune to the emotion first; ‘I can see you’re feeling disappointed, upset, anxious’, then be creative together – discuss possible next steps. Relax – have a warm, relaxing bath or shower, then listen to a relaxation script or visualisation. Weekly Chill Out Night – gadget free – practise calming breaths, massage, read/ tell stories, do some colouring, play a board game, do a puzzle, make something, share some family photos, make plans for future family nights, share affirmations with one another – tell each other unique qualities each brings to the family home, eat chocolate mindfully, one tiny nibble at a time, listen to a relaxation script or some music.

If you’d like to find out more, visit www.beberkshire.co.uk or send an email to: amanda@beberkshire.co.uk or call/text on 07909502667

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O&A AUTUMN 2019