journal d'une transition

260

At noon, emptying my pockets after the work, I find a good-size yellow live scorpion! It must have spent the whole morning there! I feel the need to write to Satprem. It is slowly formulating itself – about this letter we had wished to send to the Government and this whole question of “timing”: who is to judge, and on what basis, when the time is “right”… I put it on paper during my afternoon watch… *2-12-1979, Auroville: My foot is so swollen and painful, I can hardly walk. It is puzzling. Yel prepares a poultice of crushed neem leaves; I clean up the house, then, and I am late for C.E’s bandages… Amma came and began to lament when she saw my foot… … J.G came by to study with me the structure for the roof of C’s house, so we can have a blue-print and apply for the cement; he also showed me his latest study for the city area, it is interesting… In it there is a kind of residential garden, a crescent- like feature that corresponds on the map to our place here, just as it had earlier been projected when I started work here… … Narayana’s two daughters are here on vacation: every time I see Lily, growing and maturing, I find her more interesting, with more depth to her… *3-12-1979, Auroville: I have limped over to work. Late morning, we all have a meeting in the office, agreeing that we must have one every Monday to see all the works: there are Narad, Piero, Yus, Myrtle, John H, Sally, Bill S, G, Phil, P.G, G.M, Marcia, F.Gr, J, Jacq… We have a little clash while discussing the Gardens, as F.Gr is willing to take some responsibility this coming year: there is talk of demolishing the built slopes of the cone of the Urn and replace them with grass and I firmly object, on the principle that it is absurd to destroy anything and seeing that the eagerness to do so only shows that we are not centred and do not have the right attitude yet… For I have watched people doing just that, or wanting to do just that, demolish, destroy, and I feel it is wrong… But there is a general openness for the possibility of further landscaping and planting wherever the land is available without getting too inhibited by plans and designs that are too abstract and rigid for us to agree on… … This afternoon, P.L called us to gather at the Camp for an “interview” on Matrimandir which he wants to publish in the Review; it is interesting to see how each one responds; I see once more how G.M’s and my own experience of Matrimandir are deeply united; Piero is… equal to himself, a strange mind…! And there and then he shows us another letter from the SAS he has just received, one more intimation to surrender and return to the good path and be forgiven…!It would make anybody else laugh, I believe, but it does affect him! … My foot is getting huge, it is awful; there is no pus, but a light liquid oozing and the skin is bubbling and blistering, it looks more like poisoning than an infection… … V has come back to stay here another few days…

*5-12-1979, Auroville: C.E’s wounds are healing well; it may be possible to have the stitches removed tomorrow. My foot is returning gradually to its normal size, but there is a strange blood clot.