It's Not About Me

Graveside services were held at Historic Elmwood Cemetery in Memphis, TN at 10:00 am on Friday, September 3 with the Chaplain Eyleen Farmer officiating.

When first diagnosed at Methodist Hospital in early March 2004 with the fatal disease of pancreatic cancer by her doctor, Janet said she had but two wishes … one was to see her son get married and the other was to live long enough to see her grandkids. Fortunately, I got her out of the hospital in time to be at Jay and Mary’s wedding on March 20, 2004; sadly, she would not live long enough to see her granddaughter. When asked by her doctor if she wanted to undergo chemotherapy, etc., she only asked him one question? Will it prolong the quality of my life? And he said no…and Janet’s reply was that she would forgo further treatment and later went into hospice care at our home. Fortunately, Jay and Mary were both visiting her here in Memphis when she finally succumbed to the disease; she died at home on August 29, 2004 – one day before her 60 th birthday!

We were married almost 32 years. Her delayed passing allowed her to meet with friends and relatives and say h er last “goodbyes” and settle her affairs, but my grieving was greatest from the day when she learned of her terminal illness until her ultimate death in late August.

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