USD Magazine Spring 2006

O n the streets of New York, Louise Stanger found reminders of 9/11 everywhere. Firehouse doors. The incessant sound of sirens. Ground Zero. Just about any place Stanger went, 9/11 was close enough to reach out and touch. And she knew those reminders remain particularly poignant for the women whose firefighter husbands died as heroes on Sept. 11, 2001. It was those women that Stanger — USD’s director of alcohol and other drug services — was in New York to help. She spent some time this fall giving 6 AROUND THE PARK by Kelly Knufken [ h e a l i n g a r t s ] USD MAGAZINE

TIME TO LAUGH AGAIN Louise Stanger helps 9/11 widows move on with their lives

workshops to help them explore what they might want from their dating life. While there, she got a look at New York as the 9/11 wid- ows see it. Stanger is fond of say- ing, “Once a widow, always a widow,” but in the Big Apple, she learned there are even more complexities involved for these particular widows. “They’re a wonderful group of women trying to live ordinary lives in extraordinary times,” Stanger says. Her workshops were aimed at helping them re-enter the dating pool, but she also brought knowledge that could help them feel less isolated.

Some of what Stanger knows about being a widow comes from talking with hundreds of widows while researching her doctoral dissertation on resiliency among those left behind. Based on those interviews, she is devel- oping a book titled Good Grief for Widows and Their Families . She credits her doctoral adviser, USD business professor Johanna Hunsaker, with allowing her to research the topic she was most passionate about. But most of what Louise Stanger knows about being a widow comes from deep within herself: It comes from being the daughter

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