Forty Days Full - An Invitation To Real Life

Another function of blame is judgement. It's another way to avoid taking personal responsibility for our life by making comparisons and drawing conclusions. If I see myself as the center of the universe, then I can claim the right to judge. My judgments give me a sense of superiority and power. When I keep the focus on what everyone else has done, then I don't have to deal with my stuff. This deflection is just another form of self-protection. We simply don't have the right to sit in the seat of judgment. That seat is reserved for Christ alone. I've found that most relational messes are a team effort. If we try to clean it up with blame as our goal, we increase the possibility of a greater mess. "You did this...then I did that...then you did this again. Then other people got involved...then I got mad...then you yelled at me...then I tried to choke you, etc..." It is very much like trying to unscramble scrambled eggs. Humility is essential whenever we try to clean up a mess. I must take responsibility for my actions. And, If a little extra egg gets on my face, so what? I can't let pride interfere when a cleanup is needed. If you're a leader, you'll usually get someone else's egg on your face. So what! Don’t let fear of what people think cause you to fall into the blame game. There are some people who avoid dealing with the wounds of the past. They'll say things like, "The past is the past! I can't do anything about it now." Well, actually you can. Even if you may never see that person who hurt you again, you can make a new choice to forgive. Forgiveness is the difference between stuffing pain or healing pain. If you avoid certain people when you see them, you need to forgive. If the pain of someone’s offense is controlling you, your need to forgive. If you’re having a difficult time making new friends because you can’t trust, you