myTescoma 1/2019en

Good resolutions for...

BRIDGET WHO?

a new life.

CHIARA I was a bit reluctant at the idea of writing a “not so secret diary” of the magical world (or rather a jungle?) of singles over 30... but still, for those readers that aren’t exactly a stereotype of the perfect housewife, here’s my “spinster 2.0” life on stage: my anti-Bridget Jones’s diary – nothing like that clumsy boozer struggling with her weight all the time... needless to say, any resemblance to actual persons and/or actual events is purely coincidental!

THE BEGINNING OF A NEW YEAR

Either on December 31 or January 1, it’s the same old story every year, I find myself grabbing a pen and piece of paper to write down a list of my new year’s resolutions. I started this habit BRINGS AN INEVITABLE SENSE OF DUTY WHEN IT COMES TOGOOD RESOLUTIONS. SAME OLD STORY EVERY YEAR. BUT WHAT IF I REFUSED TO MAKE THAT LIST FOR ONCE?

when I was 25 or 26: I was full of enthusiasm and good will and thought that if I had them written black on white, my goals would have been clearer and more easily achievable. No matter what kind of goals, it could be the resolution of being kinder to people or keeping my underwear drawer tidy, making the bed every morning or finding a boyfriend (is that a snigger that I’m hearing?). Curiously enough, the easiest resolutions were those that I have always neglected, apart from having my hair done perfectly every day maybe - but frankly, I wouldn’t describe that as “easy” with my big bush of frizzy hair, right??? Anyways, whatever the resolutions, I found myself looking back at the past years feeling guilty for what I hadn’t achieved. Or even worse, when the year was almost over I would feel the pressure of the forthcoming end and would waste the following months fearing some kind of failure... just to start over again on January. Until this year, when I found myself overwhelmed by a Christmas that wasn’t a real Christmas but rather a sequence of obligations, cliché gifts, lunches and dinners to attend and people to see (but how many of those people did I really care about?)... that’s when I felt I had to change something. From now on, no more new year’s resolutions, no more lists, no more Dec 31 as a deadline for my goals. I decided to stop looking forward to an upcoming year as a turning point: it doesn’t take a year to change things, one second is just enough if you want to, and it can be right now, not within the next 12 months. I decided I would stop sacrificing my spare time doing things and seeing people just because I’m expected to, instead of doing what I love. From now on I would stop eating twice as much as I need to eat, just because someone fills up my dish. Listen to myself and understand what I want instead of doing what I’m expected to do, that would be my goal.