TE20 Migrant Mosaics

Songs for 3:45 am

Denial in Practice

This isn’t a towel, it’s my sweater you’re wiping your face on, even though I’m wearing it. Not exactly how it happened, but enough for a memory. This isn’t beautiful, just rolling paper stained purple. I was cutting onions before I rolled this cigarette, purple onions, this purple, burning nothing. This isn’t my brain, it’s instant coffee. This isn’t gonna be night, I’m just shutting off the monitor. This isn’t silence, just me reading the spines of the books tossed on the shelves while lying down. This isn’t you not being here, but let’s say you went in first, because the bath was ready, and I said I’ll be there in a minute, but first I’m gonna listen to this while I get undressed. Some song. Let’s say these are the lyrics. Not exactly, but that’s enough for a poem. This isn’t music, just something I say to myself while I get undressed, so quietly that it looks like my purple lips are shaking from swimming too long.

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