journal d'une transition

261

… J.P has come to confirm that I do object to the setting of telephone poles all over Auroville; I explain that I have nothing against “modern technology” and do not expect that we’ll have mastered telepathy so soon, but that I see no need to imprint Auroville with these big ugly cement poles and thick overhead cables when, in a few years time, it may become possible to lay invisible underground cabling… He wants that we issue a common statement… … In the office I find G helping F.Gr laying a protective coat over his model for the Gardens; I ask a few questions; I yearn for something which I have not yet quite met in any of those who have delved into this work… F.Gr, like most of the others so far, refuses any defined over-all pattern, seeing any definition as a crippling limitation, and I feel sorry about it. It reminds me of all the resistances and projections one had to repel so that the inner Chamber could be done as You had actually described it… No one seems yet able to receive gratefully ALL the indications You have given and respect them as definitions and boundaries, charged by You with true meaning, within which one could then draw from an inexhaustible source of creativity… Instead, everyone seems to be imposing another vision, arbitrarily selecting from all that You have said and wished for… We are not mature enough… I would like to find someone with whom to assemble ALL You have said about the Gardens at one time or another, incorporate what has actually been already done on the ground and see how it can all harmonise; and then, from that basic simple organisation, to allow ourselves to be creative. There are three elements in this, which must be mutually attuned: there is the higher consciousness that is to manifest in forms, here; there is the consciousness within Nature, that will materialise these forms; and there is our consecration, creativity and care… I feel the NEED to do what YOU wish. For instance, no one here at present even considers the possibility of a place for Huta. Yet one has to, simply because You have promised it to her; and that is sacred. One thing alone could annul that promise: that Huta herself would choose to withdraw out of a clear inner urge – which she has not done. On the contrary, she has been most faithful, persevering and attentive and she has known to support Auroville. Yet, were I to say this openly, I would incur all kinds of sarcasm, scorn and contempt or, at best, sheer indifference…! … I take V back to Pondy in the afternoon; it is quiet and harmonious between us. She asks me when she can come again; I can only commit to this rhythm of two days a week, for now, and she seems to understand and accept it well. Where it leads, I don’t know… *6-12-1979, Auroville: At the PT meeting, Dee and Dennis report on their visit to “Findhorn”. It seems to be, depressingly, the same everywhere, here included: groups clashing, conflicts between individuals and groups, not practicing what one preaches….Five of us met with the President yesterday, while he was touring Pondy; various reports… The same ill plaguing us: lack of commitment…! … Once everything is set for dinner, I leave Phil do the serving and cycle down to the Nursery to meet with Narad and M.H; Krishna accompanies me part of the way – whenever he is with me, happy, I feel a fullness, real, right… I tell Narad and M.H how I feel one should proceed regarding the Gardens of Matrimandir, what one ought to try, regardless of any “position” or opposition: to collect ALL You have said at different times and to different people… I find them to