News Scrapbook 1956-1959

November 6, 1958

T HE PAPER

Page 2 Only Adam Indispensable I F THE NEW "C" average eligibility ruling is to be applied at all, it should be applied unequivocally, or else it becomes unjust. It is a fallacy to think that any particular student at the University is so indispensable that his absence would disrupt the operation of the Associated Student Body. Last week the question arose as to whether ASB officers should or should not be excluded from the eligibility ruling, even though ASB work is obviously extra-curricular activity. Faculty moderators seem to be divided on the question. Some members of the faculty maintain that the student coun- cil should not be bound by the rule, for two reasons: (1) a student must have had at least a 2.5 average to get on the student council; (2) the ineligibility of any student council member would hinder the operation of the Associated Student Body. Others of the faculty maintain, and rightly so, that no one taking part in any extra-curricular activity should be exempted from the ruling. Their argument is that the primary motive behind the ruling is to preserve a proper balance be- tween academic and extra-curricular activities. If that is not the main motive behind it, then there is no plausible reason for its existence. There is another point regarding the fluidity of the appli- cation of the eligibility ruling that is open to scepticism. Is the ruling accomplishing its alleged purpose by barring athletes from playing in the actual games, yet allowing them to spend a dozen hours a week at practice? It seems illogical to assume that an athlete would devote game time to studying. If he could not be a participant, he would almost certainly be a spectator. And if we assume that he does devote game time to studying, can he accomplish in two hours what he would have accomplished in the six times two hours spent in practice? Of course not. The Pa.per this week has temporarily lost its editor, led like a lamb to ineligible, ineluctable, extra-curricular slaugh- ter. But The Pa.per (and its faculty moderator) rejoices, smug in its stand against sin. The lamb had it c9ming. The Paper bows to the eligibility ruling, satisfied that the punish- ment was deserved. But unless the ruling is applied without discrimination, even that small measure of consolation will be taken away. INTRA NOS Quote of the semester: Dean Parker: "In any society the position of woman Is not what It appears to be." .... Shrdlu of the year, In the San Diego Light House: "Singer Sarah Vaughn married Clyde B. Atkins, a taxicab fleet owner, in a Chicago City Hall ceremony. It was Miss Vaughn's second marriage. She formerly was the wife of George Treadwell, her manager. Atkins has not been marred before." .... Thanks to Gene Sherman, Los Angeles Times columnist, for calling The Paper "a dandy." . . . . Thanks to the San Diego Trlb's Nell Morgan, too, for his plug for The Paper. But we wish he would give the institution its chartered name, "The University of San Diego," not "San Diego University." Please, Morgan Nell .... The same bouquet and plea go to Catholic football's old friend, Chuck Johnson of the Los Angeles Tidings ... That three-alarm false-alarm fire last week was the innocent work of a Women's College student ... Father Dollen announces that the first floor of the library will be open for use Monday . . . . When are we going to get crucifixes in More Hall's third floor classrooms? .... Bill Kidder, golf secretary, says that the turnout is poor on Fridays at 3 p.m. for the golf class at the Mission Valley Country Club .... James Dean thanks the Linda Vista Sentinel for reprinting his alligator story .... The strike is over for Father Buetzler, who now eats at the seminary .... 1\1:r. Nacozy is now con- ducting Open House nightly in his East San Diego home while his boss is in Los Angeles having a grandchild. Being a grandfather doesn't bother him as much as being married to a grandmother .... Dr. Vince and Mr. Swan will receive the sacrament of confirmation from Bishop Buddy tonight at 7:30 in the Bishop's chapel .... The Paper's art editor, Jim Wargln, made the New Mexico junket in place of the ineligible Vinyard . . . . And putting one little word after another, whatever became of the Golden Greek! . . .. That headline, by the way, for the benefit of Women's College students, is in Latin .... See you at St.alag 17. THE PAPER PUBLISHED BI-MONTHLY DURING THE SCHOLASTIC YEAR BY THE ASSOCIATED STUDENT BODY, COLLEGE FOR MEN, UNIVERSITY OF SAN DIEGO, ALCALA PARK, SAN DIEGO 10, CALIFORNIA. Editor ......................................................................... ....Ineligible A · !ant Editor....................................................William Hagen Art Editor.... .........................................................James Wargin Sports Editor....................................................Donald Gwaltney Faculty Moderator......................................Fr. John B. Bremner Staff Reporters: Dennis Brokaw, Bob Gengler, Don Giesing, Bill Kidder, Jim LaBrie, John Markley, Jack Power, Dick Shea, Rolf Smith, Bill Thomas, Bill van der Werf, C. G. Walker, Chuck Williams

Fifth Colun1n By PAUL BURTON (Continued from La&t luue) Lowbrowed Sophomore Ar- boreal, our star reporter , hightailed it back this week from the Apes' Convention he had been covering. The world's apes, he explained, got together to solve the problems caused by t h e world's people, who had made monkeys of themselves try- ing to legislate peace. This was his tale of the final ses- sion: On resumption, a young ape swung out of a back branch and proffered a resolution he had filched from an old United Ape- doms file. He felt it might give the delegates some ideas on what kind of communique to release to the press to convey the conven- tion's sense of unity, high purpose, mutual trust, peaceful coexistence, lessening of tension, restraint of Chiang, and the satellite nations had it coming anyway. So he read the resolution, which was enthusiastically adopted be- cause it was wordy and high- sounding and didn't seem to say much. Only later was it discovered that the resolution was so worded as to say something different to everybody who read it. But the delegates felt that that was what made it such a good resolution. You could read it and make it come out either way. Then a lot of other resolutions w e r e enthusiastically adopted, principal among which were: Controls. * Biblical Sanction for Govern- ment Ownership of Coconuts. * Free Bananas for Titoists and Other Communists United for the Separation of God and America. * Non-Segregation of Albino Apes. * Extension of Social Security to Every Kind of Monkey Busi- * Need for Worldwide Fruit Everything was going along fine till some obstinate old reactionury- ness.

WARGi~

IF IT FITS, WEAR IT DEAR SIR

He Likes It to develop more order, discipline and forethought in your manage- (The iwriter of the followinir ment of practical affair5. Tha~ vir- letter i• education editor of the tue, sir, is prudence. Democrat Chronicle of Roche&ter, N.Y.) Yours &c.

BILL TONY

It's about time somebody had the courage to call a paper The Paper. It's really clever and ex- tremely- well written. Congratula- tions. I particularly liked the edi-

-0- Heal Thysell.f

To say that Thursday night's torial, "Right to Think," and the political forum was a succeas is Fifth Column. Is Paul Burton a an understatement. To say that Democrat or a Republican? very few students attended is also

an understatement. State Senator

Yours &c.

AL BERGERON Kraft and Mr. Hugo Fisher pro-

vided an interesting evening. The same is true of our recent "Pu-

(Burton i& not a member of any oriranized politica.l party. He i& a Republican.-Ed.) -0--- He Too (The writer of the followinir letter i• the West Coa&t Reirional American Airline&.) I am glad to note that the Uni- versity- of San Diego has a sur- prisingly large number of intelli- gent eggheads. Tell your faculty moderator to keep his reactionary fingers out of the editorial policy. Good paper, sharply written, well made-up. Whatever happened to the hunger-striking priest? Yours &c. BILL HIPPLE --o- Not He Two weeks ago you were asked to give publicity to an academic program sponsored by the ASB Council and one of its subcommit- tees. This publicity was sorely needed. Yet you refused to print the $j;pq,.because you thought this student body program "relatively unimportant." Evidently you are not impressed by the fact that the ASB Council is struggling to raise academic in- terest on our campus. I suggest you practice a cardi- nal virtue that should enable you

rents' Night" program. threw a monkey wrench into the Why such small turnouts? We works by presenting this resolu- think this poor response is due to tion: poor publicity. We further think "WHEREAS most of us don't that the fault lies not so much in know what we're talking about,

the sparse poster coverage or in and the small mention accorded these

"WHEREAS some of us woulrl

like to speak honestly, and

Director of Public Relation• for events at student body meetings.

No, the fault lies somewhere else "WHEREAS many of us don't -in the student body itself, for know what truth is anyway, whose benefit these events are "BE IT RESOLVED that we ask arranged. Let's make an effort to get in- terested in these affairs. Let's the Anthropoid Press and the Monkeyshine Broadcasting Com- pany- to consider and publicize

these resolutions for what they are, namely, the majority opinion of the 10 per cent of the delegates to this convention who stayed long enough to vote on them, and not the unanimous opinion of Ape- dom." This, of course, split the con- vention right down the middle. Some delegates agreed that res- olutions weren't worth the banana leaves they were written on, that 90 per cent of the individuals for whom they presumed to speak nev- er heard of them, that 90 per cent of those who heard of them didn't bother to read them and that 90 per cent of those who read them didn't agree with them but had no chance to speak up. So the whole convention broke up in disorder. General feeling was one of disappointment at the way the apes had run the meeting. There was too much downright people business about it.

talk about them and then get out and take advantage of what is usually an interesting evening. Yours &c. DAN WACHOWIAK

GIVE to the UNITED FUND