NOCTILUCA February 2017

Raven Wilson By Yasmeen Ashour

Love for poetry, music, and art are known pieces of RavenWilson, but there are things she did not know about herself that she had to recently come to terms with. “At first I didn’t think there was anything weird because I have always just been that way and people have always made comments about both my negative behavior and high energy. All of the judgement and assumptions people made about me gave way to a heavy depression, and I attempted suicide in middle school. I just didn’t know anything about mental illness as a whole let alone everything in between,

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just all that gray area.” Her expedition began with a concerned teacher suggesting to her mother that she get tested for ADHD, but nothing was ever medically confirmed. She was encouraged to test for Bipolar dis- order instead, which is a “mental disorder marked by alternating peri- ods of elation or depression.” This terrified her, and she tried to move past it. It was easier to do so because following the first tests, she went through a long period of happiness. Soon, this would subside and she felt inadequate again. “I make it such a priority for others to take care of

themselves and I don’t really do that for myself...I go through periods where I don’t want to let myself think about it... But then it hits me in the face that it’s just not realistic to pretend anymore. I want to get better for my loved ones and...for me. So as of now, I am working through, with the support of my peers, learning about myself and how to take care of myself.” Raven Wilson is described by everyone as one of the most compassionate and enthusiastic people in and out of the classroom who has never been held back from her passions. She has many aphorisms but the one that she uses most is “You get out of life no more than what you put into it. If you stay strong and con- tinue to put out positive energy, you may just end up happy.”

Skye Iwanski By Yasmeen Ashour

Her diagnosis is Misophonia, but her name is Skye Iwanski. Misophonia is a strong dis- like or hatred for specific sounds that could result in panic or rage. Also known as Selective Sound Sensitivity Syndrome, it starts with a trigger, which is typically a sound made orally like heavy breathing or whistling but can also be a small repeated sounds, like rustling. A mild reaction could be anxiety or discomfort, but a major reaction could include panic and overall emotional distress

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that could result in suicidal thoughts or tendencies. “It manifested in my sophomore year and I had no idea where to even begin to describe what was wrong and I couldn’t accept myself because I didn’t know...” Although she never acted on thoughts of self harm, emotional self harm was prevalent and the extreme desperation resulted from not being able to mentally justify her feelings. She actually discovered Misophonia on a Tumblr post depicting mental illnesses as fantastical creatures. “First I was apprehensive and I didn’t see how treatment could help me... It

was more a quieter and longer coming to terms with myself.” When asked about over- coming obstacles in school and everyday life, she said, “I have wonderfully supportive parents and the influential words of my counselor. Surrounding myself with supportive and positive people helps me to get through a difficult day.” Misophonia has made her no less capable of remarkable things. Skye Iwanski loves to read, write and learn, and it is easy to recognize her for her accomplishments rather than Misophonia that is only a part of her.

Kenady Duesterhaus By Yasmeen Ashour

“I was walking in the hallway at school my junior year... All of a sudden I just couldn’t breathe ...I tried to like, deep breathe and then just after I was looking back on it and I knew it was a panic attack.” Kenady is a senior at North, living with a disease called Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. This is a physical ailment that not much is known about other than that it is extreme exhaustion worsened by mental and physical activity. The diagnosis of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

or more commonly known, ME drove Kenady into an easily depress- ible state, closing her off to her friends and family and making her less motivated. “I think the worst was when they finally diagnosed it. I just sat in my house and cried for the whole day. Because people really don’t know anything about it, I felt like there was just no way I could get better. I was just looking at this whole process and thinking, there has to be an end game and then when I realized there wasn’t, that coupled with being overall sad and tired it devastated me and

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I was kind of immobile.” She was pulled out of this state of desolation by her mom telling her, “You have one day to cry and be sad and then you have to move on.” This impacted her so much that she did get past it. She is an excellent student, friend, sister and daughter despite the challenges accompanying her physical and mental illnesses. She goes through a therapy process where she talks through everything she thinks about and feels in the day with a counselor. Her message for others, struggling or not, is to talk about it. “You don’t expect people to understand or relate to it, but somehow they do…people want to help. There are so many more ways to get help and support if you just talk about it. You are never alone.”