Chapter 1 - Gretchen is a winner
Aunt Gretchen Sugarham Dungaree Graham hated losing. Her ego, almost
as fat as her thighs, could not fathom the possibility of losing. Great Aunt
Gretchen was Mortimores’ wise cracking, foul mouthed, attention seeking,
boastful, wrinkled prune, who always knew everything about everyone,
and today was no exception. The preparation for the annual Lake Eyre Tri-
athlon was in full swing, as was Great Aunt Gretchen’s plan for her fifteen
-year-old niece, Pinky, to claim victory.
“Pinky Darling,” Great Aunt Gretchen beckoned, cloaked in her signature
emu feather boa.
“Come here my precious little pumpkin.”
Pinky lifted one of her freshly manicured fingers from the overly tedious
task of tying her very own shoe laces, pushed a lock of platinum blonde
hair out of her
emerald
green eyes, and stood herself up and pranced over
to her favourite Great Aunt, Gretchen. As Pinky was being doted over by
her distant relative, Great Aunt Gretchen’s biological child Michael, simi-
lar in age to Pinky, was being blatantly ignored, which by now, he had
grown used to.