70 / 336
APR / RRi
E
- Strobes, Esq.,
Gnome House,
London YVI.
4 Little Essex Street,
London WC2.
22 October 1974.
In account with
G O O D M A N D E R R I CK & CO.
Re: Damage to bumper of vehicle reg. no. ARC 001N
September 19th 1974
September 20th 1974
fin
O c
t ober 20th 1974
To professional services
in relation to the above
matter, viz: listening to your telephone call describing
an alleged incident in Tesco Road, Neasden, on
October 1st 1961; to making notes on same; to
forgetting matter entirely for three weeks; to listening
to your further instructions enquiring why the hell
had done nothing about the matter; to making feeble
excuses during the course of said conversation, to
passing whole matter on to articled clerk, viz Michael
Tharg; to said M. Tharg writing a professional letter to
you requesting further and better particulars of the
said matter; to having said letter typed by pro-
fessionally ' qualified
person,
viz
Miss
Janice
Brocklebank Fowler; to folding, sealing, and stamping
of letter; to consulting London Telephone Directory to
ascertain your full and proper place of abode; to the
taking of the aforementioned letter down three flights
of stairs, and along street to a proper place of despatch
as ordained by the Postmaster General, viz a pillar
box; to waiting four days for receipt of your reply; to
full and due perusal of the contents thereof, and in
particular your suggestion that ourselves had shown
'gross incompetence and idleness" in pursuing this
matter, and in noting your instruction to us all
severally and collectively to take a running jump into
a duly specified place, viz one lake.
We herewith take pleasure in rendering our full and
final account in the sum of
P.S. Further to the above, we beg to render the
following additional account in respect of this matter,
viz to typing of above bill, to perusal of same, to
correction of typing errors with Rubinstein's Patent
Eraser, to licking of stamp on envelope, and to rubbing
of hands at the thought of enormous cheque in the
post.
P.P.S. We beg to inform you that owing to the
incidence of inflation since we began the compilation
of the above bill, the total liability now amounts to
N.B. We further beg to inform you that failure to
render settlement in full within 24 hours will result
in our placing the matter in the hands of our legal
advisers, Messrs. Goodman, Derrick & Co.
"MONEY IS OUR BUSINESS"
A bill of the type to which it is believed Lord Goodman strongly objects.
Charges and
disbursements
£8,984.68
+ V.A.T. £726.42
£461.34
£25,468.00
67