Trafika Europe 11 - Swiss Delights

stoneage

observation ward “sunshine”. doctor schwarz fetches me with his blue car. we drive to town. a tall, old house. on the second floor the rooms of the doctor. everything gray and white. a room with three beds. doctor’s face very close tomine. i am twelve years old. he talks friendly. his bald pate glows, it is red. the blue suit stretches over the belly. his chin hangs over the shirtcollar. he sweats. there is an indoor lime tree in the room. i lie on a bed, my hands and feet strapped down. it smells of medication. a man and a woman, she stands silently at the head of the bed. a needle enters my arm, something thick, foul smelling is pushed into my mouth. i am paralyzed. everything turns white. someone holds my head. i feel the cold. the face of doctor schwarz very close. screaming, beastly screaming, deep inside the brain agonizing pain. fear, fear that they will kill me. stop, please, stop. don’t kill, please, please, don’t kill. why do you do this? i am dying. the pain drives into the body as burning lightning. nurse hanna maria’s voice like a knife. blackness, a hole. i am so far away. i want to come back. but i am caught in unimaginable pain, frozen in an inhuman cramp. i am dead. they have killed me. the pain sinks down into the bottomless. help, help me, please. i cannot endure this any more. what did i do? what did i do that you’re killing me?

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