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Tanya Maliarchuk
my four human appendages.
I would use it for its primary
purpose – I’d use it to chase
away flies from my body, the
table, the bed, from other
people. Because flies have
become
very
audacious
lately and aren’t afraid of
my hands. They sit on me
without the least amount of
fear, as though I’m some kind
of corpse or even something
inorganic. I understand: it’s
possible that during this late
autumn season, flies simply
just can’t react, they’re
all somehow impeded, as
though they’re peacefully
waiting for their own death,
as though someone had
fed them something sleep-
inducing. It’s possible that’s
just the reason the flies act
so audaciously: they’re just
sleepy and I think they’re
audacious. But all this
wouldn’t mean anything if I
only had a tail. Then I could
chase them away from here
really easily. Or even kill
them. If I had a tail, and if
it were real, because I don’t
want a prosthetic tail. I want
a real one.
I think there would only
be one problem with it – it
would be hard to sit. On a
chair, on a couch, on a bed,
on the ground. The tail would
get in the way. I’d refuse to
sit because of it. Because
there would be good reason.
I’d have a tail!
Don’t think I want to be
different or something else
there, I don’t want to be
different from other people
– in general I’d sneeze at
that. I might, maybe, not
even show anybody my tail.
Though it certainly would
be hard to hide it. Because a
horse needs to be big, fluffy,
splendiferous. I’d comb it.
Clean it often. Perfume it.