with Sri Ganesh

- 09-08-14:

… Yesterday evening at last it rained; not for long, but enough to relieve all the plants and the air at once became much cooler… … When I came this morning, P was waiting for me; I sat him down next to me in the garden and asked him to explain what he had written in his notebook, So it is clear that he began this dissembling soon after he returned from the hospital, as soon as he was able to move about on his own, and that it had been like “something else” in him, which he was not able to push out. He says that he has been asking Ganesh’s and Your help, and does not know what to do. Anyway, the first times he stole money using my old SBI card was to repay some loans he had taken earlier, before he had fallen so ill; then he used another of my cards in order to retrieve Viji’s jewels which had been pawned, also before his near-death experience… The next two times was to level and fence the land which his father had finally transferred in his name. Later on it was to help out Dasan’s and Satya’s families… And so on… I told him that I do not believe in punishment, but that his present condition was itself the punishment and it will only lift when he finds the resolve and courage to drive out this alien influence… Again I insisted he must gather his family and tell them clearly what all he has done and they should together figure out how to proceed; that he must either live off his land now, or find a job to support his family (somewhere I sense he still expects me to continue taking care of it all, even though he understands it is not possible)… … The night before last it drizzled gently for several hours and the air became very cool and yesterday it remained mostly grey and last night again there was a little rain and more drizzling… Rs. 20/- are offered… … The matter with P has been deeply unsettling… I wanted to howl from this peculiar pain of realization, of having lived a lie, of having been deceived and used and manipulated by the very being I wanted to trust and rely on… … But actually, I know nothing, understand nothing; I have lived here more than 40 years and have no comprehension of what moves people, of how they function, of what matters to them, of what are the laws at work within them, neither in Auroville nor outside of it… - 11-08-14:

Namaste King Ganapataye

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