Newbury Weekly News

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Thursday, May 11, 2017
FOR the past three years,
anxiety has been the top
presenting issue in the
counselling room at Time to
Talk West Berkshire, and
indeed, if you look at national
statistics, this is a common
picture.
So why are young people today
feeling so anxious?
I have some thoughts about this
to share with you.
First of all, we live in an anxious
world; the threat of terrorism,
the fear of financial insecurity,
politics turning on its head, the
threat of greenhouse gasses etc
etc. Good news doesn’t make the
news.
We are constantly bombarded
with things to worry about and I
mean constantly – with new
technology we receive news
immediately.
When the terror attack happened
in London on Wednesday, March
22, around 3pm, most of us knew
about it before 6pm.
Our anxiety can be felt by our
children.
Secondly, there is huge pressure
for young people to achieve at
higher and higher levels.
Of course, we want our young
people to be successful, but often,
rather than this being a positive
aspiration, it becomes driven by
fear. Schools are fearful of being
judged for not ‘making’ it
possible for their pupils to
achieve the highest grades and
sometimes the cost is the
emotional health of the young
person.
The fear that the job market is
highly competitive is passed on
from adults to children, with the
message that if you do not
succeed in your exams ‘you will
fail in life’.
There is a lot of fear passed from
Ofsted to schools, from parents to
schools, from schools to parents
and ultimately all of it is put on
to young people.
Many of the anxious young
people in the counselling room
are high achievers and a few are
young people who cannot achieve
and are being failed by the
current curriculum.
Young people frequently tell me
that their best is never good
enough for the adults – they
always want more.
They tell me they constantly feel
judged, by the adults in their
lives and by their peers too –
being judged makes you anxious.
We live in a culture of
perfectionism.
Following on from my last
paragraph; high achievers are
now expected to get all A*s.
Instead of being able to celebrate
one, two or three A*s, they will
bemoan not achieving eight.
Perfectionism doesn’t stop at
academic achievement.
Young people post thousands of
pictures of themselves on social
media each year and most
devices have the facility to ‘edit’
these photos.
The result is that most people
look pretty fantastic in these
photos and yet every young
person who looks in the mirror
first thing in the morning, with
no make-up and possibly bad
skin, feels like they have a
secret, which is that, in their
reality, they are ‘ugly’.
They forget everyone looks like
this at times.
The media has for many years
directly and indirectly put
pressure on young people to look
a certain way. Images of ‘perfect’
models give us all the impression
that we are less attractive.
This pressure is 10-fold in
today’s world, with the explosion
of media sources.
Sadly, it also means that the
bullying, which has always
existed to some degree in all
schools, is multiplied because
young people cannot get away
from it.
Social media has another huge
impact on young people and
anxiety, in that the constant use
of it means young people very
often are in communication of
one sort or another, most of the
day. They have no ‘down time’.
My own, perhaps idealised,
memories of getting home from
school and going out on my bike
with no real pressure to do
anything specific or be anything
or communicate with anyone,
seems to be a very rare
experience today.
We all need ‘down time’, time
where we are just being rather
than doing. After all we are
human beings not human
doings.
Finally, in the age of ‘health and
safety’, we have become risk
adverse.
Back to me on my bike. In years
gone by young people took more
exercise and more frequent
small physical risks, like riding
down a steep hill.
Small physical risks are good
because they help us to see that
we can survive things; they
build resilience.
Nowadays people either take no
risks at all or they go for the big
adrenalin hits, and too much
adrenalin causes more anxiety.
Much of what young people are
expected to do in a normal day
produces some adrenalin and
that adrenalin often remains in
their body, rather than being
dispersed through exercise or
expression.
A build-up of adrenalin causes
anxiety and panic attacks.
For brain health we need
physical health, things like
exercise, the right amount of
sleep and relaxation.
To build self-esteem young
people need seven pieces of
praise to every direct criticism –
self-acceptance leads to a
reduction in anxiety. Sriving to
do well is positive, constantly
being afraid of failure is not.
Change and progress are
inevitable and necessary, but
let’s try to keep some of the good
habits of yesteryear and of
ancient culture and let’s resist
the urge to try to do more in less
time better and better.
DAVINA NICHOLSON MBACP
Acrred
School counsellor
MENTAL health-related
issues in young people have
been an area of concern over
the last few years; in fact the
issue appears to be escalating
at quite an alarming rate.
Over the last five years, 90 per
cent of headteachers have
reported an increase in mental
health problems among pupils
and, over the same period,
hospital admissions for self-
harm have doubled for under 18s.
Here at Padworth, most of our
students are under 18 and in our
care for a substantial portion of
the week, if not all of it.
Therefore, we are very focused
on removing the stigma
associated with mental health
and also putting preventative
care in place.
I firmly believe that, for those
students who require it, we
need to be offering a means of
assessment, counselling and
consultation which co-exists
with the promotion of universal
well-being.
In short, we need to be very un-
British – and make sure that we
provide plenty of opportunities
to ‘talk about it’.
Instead of offering discreet,
wooden guidance, we need to be
open and vocal about the issue.
Above all, we need to advocate
the message that it is ‘okay not
to be okay’ and that we are here
to help.
As Padworth College is
predominantly a boarding
school which homes a vast range
of nationalities, we understand
how initially, it can be a difficult
transition for our students.
Often, they have travelled from
a place very far from the
Berkshire countryside, with
little access to familiarity and
are surrounded by strangers
who are not necessarily
proficient in their language.
So, we put certain measures in
place to ensure that the
transition is a smooth and not a
daunting one, which, instead of
fear, cultivates a sense of
bonding amongst our students.
It is really important that we
set up a safe and reassuring
environment for everyone who
attends Padworth – whether
they board or attend during the
day.
Additionally, we have found
common ground for our
students through the
co-curricular activities that we
offer, such as our running club
which is led by our deputy
principal, Chris Randell.
He is an avid runner who uses
his sessions to reflect and
refocus – it is a routine that
gives balance and release to
both his and the students’
stresses, and therefore prevents
some of those difficult days.
To start with, Chris welcomed
students to join him on one of his
weekly runs, which soon grew
and turned into a running club.
The weekly run creates team
spirit, enjoyment and
togetherness, as well as an
opportunity to expel stress and
boost endorphins.
Chris takes the students out in
all weather conditions to
uphold the principle of finding
balance within a busy week and
also to teach perseverance,
resilience and self-discipline.
These attributes are necessary
for tackling issues and
overcoming them – whether it
be switching off from an
approaching exam or dealing
with a more personal issue.
Being so committed and
determined to achieve his
personal goals, Chris completed
an impressive total of 2,801km
in 2016.
He said: “Reaching my target at
the end of November was an
amazing feeling and I hope that
this can serve to inspire our
students to reach their goals.”
At Padworth, we have different
approaches to communication,
and the way our teachers
interact with students makes
for a more collaborative and
friendly environment.
For example, students address
staff on a first-name basis and
are not required to wear school
uniform, in an effort to create a
sense of ease in their
surroundings. We also
encourage language workshops
as a way to break the ice
between unfamiliar languages,
which builds relationships
amongst the students.
As a boarding school, we
organise an interesting range
of educational and social
pursuits which offer students
different outlets and support
their personal development.
We have a fully-trained therapy
dog on campus which visits
primary schools and hospitals,
helping individuals to benefit
from her calming influence and
friendly nature.
These methods work for us and
our students, but I am very
aware that the problem is
growing and every school
should be fine tuning its own
methods to maintain a
beneficial mental health
environment for its students.
Keep it simple – a message that
is sometimes forgotten.
Often simple offerings like our
running club can act as a
successful form of alternative
therapy, for stresses that do not
necessarily need discussing.
The physical therapy ensures a
healthy level of physical and
mental health and it also
develops self-awareness in the
students, so that they listen to
their body and know when they
need to slow down in all areas
of life.
Teenagers in general have
fluctuating hormones, which is
why they need more support
during this phase of their life.
Different degrees of support are
necessary, depending on the
individual and the situation.
Efforts need to be made to
identify signs of concern early,
using the different outlets
available to maintain and
encourage wellbeing.
Collectively, as a profession, we
should be at the forefront on
this issue as young people
spend a great deal of time in
our care and rely on us for the
right guidance and support.
This means thinking outside
the box a bit more so that we
can help young people to really
enjoy their formative years.
FOCUSONMENTALHEALTHAWARENESSWEEK
The counsellor contemplates
Mental Health Awareness Weekruns fromMay8-14.The
theme is ‘surviving tothriving’ andaims tooutline practical
steps thatcanbetaken tobuildamentally healthy countr y
Don’t run away from mental
health issues – just run!
JohnAguilar
By JOHN AGUILAR
Principal of Padworth College
By DAVINANICHOLSON MBACP Acrred
School counsellor
Davina Nicholson
Whyareyoung people today feeling soanxious? Anexpert view fromTimetoTalk
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