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A SPIRITUOUS DISCOURSE

73

But if you want the best French brandy,

distilled from the luscious grape, see that you

get it; and let your vision be in thorough

working order.

With the exception of the

good, conscientious spirit-distillers, all French

houses import potato-spirit in large quantities

from Germany, and re-ship it to the home of

the brave and free as superior cognac. This

alone would seem sufficient excuse for another

invasion of France ; although these evil-minded

distillers seek to justify their actions by blam

ing the phylloxera^ a little insect which has

laboured more assiduously in the cause of

temperance—by destroying the main source of

intemperance—than Sir Wilfrid Lawson himself.

" The ravages of thephylloxera" say the distillers,

in effect, " compel us to employ other materiel^

in order to fulfil our cognac contracts with the

merchants of the perfidious isle." It is related

of a theatrical "property-man" that, upon

being rebuked by the tragedian for making a

snowstorm out of brown, instead of white, paper,

he replied curtly: " It was the only paper I had;

and if you can't snow white you must snow

brown." This excuse is on a par with that

urged on behalf of the German potato-spirit.

Phylloxera vastatrix (whynot devastatrix?) has

cost France, it is said, a pecuniary loss far exceed

ing that of the Franco-Prussian war. The little

monster was discovered in North America in

1854, and whether the discoverer or one of his

friends brought the vine-killer on a holiday-trip

to Europe, or whether it worked its own passage

will never be known. But certain it is that the