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occult and veil. And this must be done at every step, for every movement and
every activity, before there can be any question of changing them…!
And as long as we remain dependent on them, even for a very small part, we
remain bound in our substance to processes that necessitate death, for death is
their pole and their balance…
So, in this way, death is also the guardian of material Truth realised!!!
It is there to see that nothing that has not become absolutely Thine, pure in Thy
Force, can be set free in Matter…
Thus one sees with great clarity how at the same time one needs more duration in
life, in the body, in order to learn to let that shift operate, and yet the more one is
prey to the necessity of death for all that is not fully transformed…
… Krishna came this afternoon, wanting me to listen to the tape of the music he
had composed for today: a cry for Sri Aurobindo from a lost spaceship filled with
humans…!
… This thing, this brief experience with Ilangu, hangs about me, with equal
amounts of attraction and repulsion… I do not wish to fool myself and simply take it
as “God-sent”… It would rather be that You let me now and then reap the results of
my active desiring…!
I do belong to Thee, yes; but it is obvious that I still retain “I ness” and still affirm
“my” needs… And if I ever make the “right” choices, it may not be for the truest of
reasons…!
*16-8-1985, Auroville:
Plodding on… I feel acutely the need of a physical renewal, as in those periodic
cleansing rituals ancient societies used to practice…
*19-8-1985, Auroville:
Today I had to acknowledge simply that I miss Auragni, and that I feel her inwardly
calling me, in some way… F has been told that she is not happy and also that Diane
is considering going back to Australia…
… This afternoon David N, visiting us at the site, told me he’d just been witness to a
heavy scene about me, at “Pour Tous”, between Jean and Ramesh, Jean forbidding
Ramesh to ever let me have a basket again, and Ramesh reminding him of the
general meeting’ decision; and it seems that Ramesh quit his job…
… I have decided to write to Satprem; nothing personal, but about Auroville…
*20-8-1985, Auroville:
Une longue communication de Satprem à Auroville est mise à la disposition de tous
aujourd’hui, une copie chez Piero et Gl, et une autre copie à « Fraternité » ; il s’agit
en fait d’un entretien de Satprem avec Sujata, enregistré et transcrit par Sujata, à
propos de la situation présente d’Auroville, et des suites et effets de la lettre de Luc
où, depuis sa position de secrétaire et d’intime de Satprem, il déclarait qu’Auroville
était « finie » ; et c’est ainsi qu’un certain nombre d’Auroviliens ont récemment
décidé de quitter Auroville, qui serait passée au service du mensonge, etc.
Je suis allé lire ces 8 pages dactylographiées ce soir : un langage très simple ; c’est
l’individu, c’est chacun qui doit trouver au-dedans le pouvoir et la capacité de
marcher, et de vraiment progresser, et c’est seulement ainsi que les forces vives de
l’avenir seront tirées, sollicitées, déclenchées, et se multiplieront… Satprem, avec
ces mots, rétablit une perspective, gentiment mais fermement, et rappelle à chacun