706 / 1424
706
*11-2-1987, Auroville:
There are so many states in one single day, and so many fluctuations of the
awareness too… Often now, since I have resumed the practice of Hatha Yoga, the
physical mind for some reason becomes very active again, loud and tiring, like a
robber of time and space…!
*12-2-1987, Auroville:
At “Ravena” P.J came again. But this time he told me why he had come in the first
place: he and Jaya have been staying at G.M’s for several months and they haven’t
found where to go now that he is returning with F, and besides that they have been
more and more involved in a research for special physical atmospheres, practices
and diets (they’re onto this now famous fruit diet), along with Sharan who is doing
polarity, massaging, etc.; and they have been thinking of “Ravena” as the ideal
place… He said that they had offered it to You, seeking Your guidance; they have
drawn sealed papers after some special meditation – he didn’t really know the
method – and received the indication, from You he said, to come to “Ravena”…
I don’t know… The talk flowed alright; I like and can respect P.J, the individual,
although I can sense a weakness there, an opening to mental influences; but I am
rather reluctant as regards this whole bubble of “healing” and so forth, and I told
him why, in clear terms… Besides, he wanted to move almost right away into the
house, on its upper floor, and I do not see that as feasible for another several
months, as I can’t see any rightness in having him and Jaya and Sharan, which
means two women, living in the midst of about twenty men working… And there’s
more to consider… So, I sent them over to Larry, as a first step!
I didn’t like much the pressure he was exerting; at the same time, there might be a
possibility there that would better correspond to the spirit of the place; but I am
not certain about that either…
It isn’t easy to have to act as a barrier, as people have their own interests and
understanding; how long can I hold the fort? I wish something soon becomes clear,
evident, one way or another… What I resent is this attitude of taking, whatever has
actually initiated and oriented the manifestation, and at what cost… Yet I felt that
P.J had a genuine respect for the place and its potentials.
… And at dinner tonight, as if by chance, John H told us of a long lecture he’d got
the day before from Jaya and P.J on the virtues of what is called “instincto-
therapy”, a method of self-cure that seems to be in great fashion in Auroville
today…! I find this phenomenon rather depressing: to open to this flourishing of
“methods” when what is needed is to open directly to the workings of the Conscious
Force, each being, each body developing their own research and evolving according
to their own discoveries, no one method being brandished around…! The thriving of
this pretentious amateurism in Auroville is disgusting!
*13-2-1987, Auroville:
I am still reading this book on Jesus the Essenian; I find it is quite a step in opening
up hitherto hidden knowledge; it is also extremely beautiful and moving, including
the revelations about the making of such a powerful collective living symbol, and it
touches on a number of questions and wonderings I have had over the years. I
have much respect for the courage and integrity manifested by these two people,
the French couple who have written this book.